Baseball's Hall of Names ... Hot Stove Holiday Edition

Tuesday, December 16 2003 @ 10:58 AM EST

Contributed by: Mick Doherty

Okay, former catcher Steve Christmas (Reds, White Sox, Cubs, 1983-1986) is too easy. Besides, with a career OPS+ of 27, he won't play much.

We could nickname White Sox hurler Dave Frost "Jack," one supposes. Minnesota pitcher Jeff Holly, up for a late '70's, early '80's cuppajoe is there. We could even team him with once-top-phenom Mike Ivie for a "Holly and Ivie" battery.

Who else makes this team? Read on for the inspiration behind this question -- thanks, Toledo Mud Hens! -- and to give your suggestions.

That's right, this version of "Hall of Names" inspired by the following actual press release from the Toledo Mud Hens Media Relations office. See the photo in the Toledo Blade.

Holiday Hens Take The Field!
The Toledo Mud Hens are pleased to announce that their "winter ball" lineup has officially taken the field. The new team will be up from 6:00 a.m. to 6:00 p.m. each day throughout the holiday season.

The infield will be solid as Toy Soldiers Ozzie and Snomar formulate the best double play combination this side of the North Pole.

Toy Soldier Brooks will be stationed at the hot corner and rumor has it that he has a rocket for an arm -- literally.

Toy Soldier JT "Snow" rounds out the infield at first base and with his oversized glove, can scoop balls out of the dirt with ease.

Roaming the outfield will be reindeers Babe, Ty, and Rob "Rein" Deer. With mitts on top of every antler, all they will need to do is get under the ball and the catch will be easy. These reindeers can fly so they pose a threat when they get on base as well.

Catching for the Holiday Hens will be none other than Santa "Yogi" Claus, himself. He knows if you’ve been good or bad and he also knows how to cut a guy off trying to steal. The only way to distract Mr. Kringle would be to leave a plate of cookies on home plate. The Hens had to also order special equipment that would fit over that bowl full of jelly.

On the mound will be Cy the Snowman with his best pitch being the "heater" as long as it doesn’t melt his hand.

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