And see inside for a special Batter's Box Hall of Names challenge!
As promised in yesterday's main thread, it's time for another trip to Baseball's Hall of Names, courtesy of Batter's Box. This time, after scratching together recent All-Smith and All-Jones teams, we turn our attention to what is likely to be a much better team, but also likely to draw out the fourth-grade humour in people ... that's right, it's time for the All-Johnsons team.
There have been exactly 100 Johnsons to make it to the big leagues so far, if you're counting Johnson Fry, and non-player but Hall of famer Ban Johnson. There have also been nine Johnstons, but these were not included.
This team has arguably the best 1-2 righty-lefty punch possible in the history of the game at the front of its rotation, has eight All-Stars and two additional Hall of Famers on the squad -- it's clearly better than both the Jones and Smith teams -- and yet, it doesn't seem quite as powerful as one might have reasonably expected.
Can you help this team out?
As noted, there has been one player in MLB history who had "Johnson" as a given, rather than family name. That would be the aforementioned Johnson Fry, a RHRP, threw 3 2/3 IP of six-hit, five-run relief in one appearance for the 1923 Indians at age 21 and never made it back to the bigs. he's not quite Allen Travers, but poor Mr. Fry did go to his eternal reward in 1959 hauling that career ERA of 12.27 with him. However, to balance that, he singled in his only big league trip to the plate, so he also (was) retired with a career batting average of an even 1.000 and a nice round OPS of 2.000.
There are plenty of multi-Johnson names, including Abe and Abbie, two Arts and a Bart, three Bills and a Billy, four Bobs, a Charles and a Charlie, two Daves and a Davey, two Dons, two Ernies, John, John Henry. Johnny and Jonathan, two Kens, three Marks, two Mikes, three Randys, two Rankins (what are the odds?), Ron, Rondin and Rontrez, three Roys, and a Walt who wasn't Walter.
For the oddity names, well, they can't hold a candle to the plethora of bizarre monikers we encountered with the Smith and Jones teams, but the Johnsons have sent forth Ban, Caleb, Chief, Dane, Jing, Footer, Lamar, Si, Spd, Syl and Youngy.
Footer? What the hell is that all about?
Anyway, here's one hack's whack at the best possible team of Johnsons; of course, we expect them to wear the uniform of the Appalachian League's ... Johnson City Cardinals.
Front Office
There can be only one:
Ban Johnson, founder of the American League
How would Pete Rose have fared against a commissioner named "Ban," anyway?
Manager & Coaches
Okay, six Johnsons have managed in the MLB ranks, including one that Jay fans know all too well. We'll give the skipper's job to potential future Hall of Famer Davey Johnson (1148-888, five leage flags, one world championship); his bench coach is the irascible Darrell Johnson (472-590, one AL title with the Carlton Fisk '75 Red Sox); your pitching coach is Walter Johnson (a fine 529-432 in parts of seven years with WSH, CLE, though he never finished higher than third). The base coaches are Roy Johnson (0-1 with '44 CHC) and Toronto's own Tim Johnson (88-74 for '98 Jays)
Starting Lineup
* indicates at least one All-Star appearance
** indicates member of Baseball Hall of Fame
CF Lance Johnson* (327 SB, six straight seasons with 12+ triples)
3B Judy Johnson** (HOF Negro League star)
LF Alex Johnson* (won 1970 batting title with CAL, .288 career hitter)
DH Cliff Johnson (196 homers, and he looked so damn mean)
SS Howard Johnson* (30/30 guy played 273 career games at short)
RF "Indian Bob" Johson* (career comps include Bernie Williams, Moises Alou)
1B Nick Johnson (Hyped? He's averaged about 80 games/year and career OPS+ is 111)
C Charles Johnson* (167 homers, four gold gloves)
2B Davey Johnson* (our player-manager hit behind Aaron, F. Robinson and S. Oh!)
Bench
C Mark L. Johnson (part-time regular for '99-'02 CHW, .217, no power)
MID IF Russ Johnson (.264, can also play 3B)
COR IF Deron Johnson (.244, 245 homers)
OF OF Sweet Lou Johnson (started for LAD in '66 WS; comps to Alvis Woods, Jacob Brumfield)
PH Billy "Bull" Johnon* (NYY; 288 HR, comps include Roy Howell, Barry Bonnell)
Rotation
LHSP Randy Johnson* (54 wins away from 300)
RHSP Walter Johnson** (117 wins past 300)
Then a prety steep dropoff to ...
LHSP John Henry Johnson (11-10 as 21-year-old rookie with '78 A's; 26-33 lifetime)
RHSP Hank Johnson (won at least 13 three times for '28-'31 NYY)
RHSP Ken T. Johnson (91-106; comp to Chris Bosio)
Bullpen by Committee
RHRP Ernie T. Johnson (40-23, 19 saves, mostly for BOS/MIL Braves in '50s)
LHRP Earl "Lefty" Johnson (40-32, 17 saves, mostly for Bosox in '40s)
RHRP Don R. Johnson (27-38)
RHSP Bart Johnson (43-51, but out of baseball at age 27)
RHSP Jason Johnson (44-73 so far)
There are a few other athletes who could probably cross over to play for this team ... if Ben Johnson can beat the new drug testing system, for instance, we can lock him in as a pinch runner. Tennessee Titans quarterback Doug Johnson has displayed a big arm at times, so he might hook on with the bullpen. And if we're looking for an extremely rich, athletically-savvy owner who could double as the PR face of the franchise, there's this Magical Johnson named Earvin ...
And now ... The Batter's Box Baseball Hall of Names Reader Challenge:
You've seen the Smiths, the Joneses and the Johnsons. What last name would provide the best possible Hall of Names team (remember, you have 25 positions to fill!) ... don't just speculate, your challenge is to build the team and send it my way so we can publish it as a special Batter's Box Pinch-Hit. You'll have the glory and honor associated with being a Box-published author, plus you can show me up by coming up with a better team than the All-Johnsons. C'mon, who's first to jump on the Robinsons or Millers?
https://www.battersbox.ca/article.php?story=20050125121438999