H is for Henderson, Hornsby and Hunter

Sunday, September 04 2005 @ 03:00 PM EDT

Contributed by: Mick Doherty

What, you were expecting "H is for Halladay, Henke and Hillenbrand"? Sorry, Blue Jays fans, but not a single player on the 25-man All-H roster (which I suppose will be tagged "The Preparation H") spent his career primarily or even notably as a Blue Jay.

No, there's no room on this team made up entirely of players whose last/family name begins with the letter "H" for Roy Halladay or Pat Hentgen, Aaron or Glenallen Hill, Shea Hillenbrand or Orlando Hudson (or Eric Hinske for that matter) ...

... not even for The Terminator, though Tom Henke came the closest of "primarily Blue Jay" candidates to making the team. There are a few guys who passed through town briefly in Rickey Henderson, who obviously will make the team, and Willie Horton, who might. And third base looks like a weak spot, so Roy Howell and Dave Hollins will get a look, but probably only in passing.

So let's take a look at MLB players from Yamid Haad to Adam Hyzdu (neither of whom will make this team, natch) ...

There's a lot of football talent here, actually; starting with former NYY OF George Halas, who went on to coach the Chicago Bears, who now have former Stanford QB Chad Hutchinson, who last season battled it out in Dallas with former Michigan signal-caller Drew Henson. See how nicely this all ties together?

Is it eerie that HOF outfielder "Sliding" Billy Hamilton played from 1888-1901 while OF Daryl Hamilton played from 1988-2001. No, I guess not ... We have three Hall of Fame managers to choose among, in Ned Hanlon, Bucky Harris and Miller Huggins, with other big-name skippers like Ralph Houk, Whitey Herzog and original Jay Roy Hartsfield also around, as are more contemporary guys like Art Howe and Clint Hurdle ... Legendary hitting coach Walt Hriniak is also available.

Looking for common H-names? You could make up a more-than-passable Hall of Names All-H team, just using the following (and in some cases, maybe a team for certain individual names) ... For instance, there have been (so far) 27 Halls and 21 Hills (including a potential battery of C Marc Hill and RHSP Marc Hall), 12 Harts (and 22 more with "Hart" starting the name), 32 Harrises, nine Hayeses (including Von and Charlie, both of whom get some attention for roster spots given the paucity of 3B candidates), 10 Hendersons (including my all-time favorite player, Ken), 13 Henrys and 22 Howards (those are family names, not first/given names), 29 Hernandezes 13 Hoffmans, two Hofmans and one Hofmann, 10 Howells, 12 Hudsons, 20 Hugheses, seven Hunts and 17 Hunters to play big league ball.

With all those family names floating around, how can we not at least mention the Hernandez half-brothers, Livan and Orlando, the entire Hairston extended family and Jim & Mike Hegan? ... The Hegans were both passably fine backstops, but with Gabby Hartnett and Elston Howard around, neither will make the team ... for that matter, neither will Randy or Todd Hundley or a variety of other solid catchers like Tom Haller, Bubbles Hargrave, Rollie Hemsley and Chris Hoiles and classic backups like Bill Haselman Ron Hassey Fran Healy Ed Hearn, Mike Heath, Ellie Hendricks, Shanty Hogan and yes, Ken Huckaby...

Hellacious Roster Decisions ... Gil Hodges and Keith Hernandez at 1B mean Todd Helton, Kent Hrbek and some others stay home ... The entire left side of the infield is problematic -- should the shortstop be Woodie Held, Granny Hamner, Bud Harrelson or Toby Harrah? At the hot corner, do you want Bob Horner, Don Hoak, Butch Hobson, Jim Ray Hart, Stan Hack or even Dave Hollins or Roy or Jack Howell? Or Harrah, for that matter? Well, for now, Toby grabs a bench spot, able to back up both Horner, who provides some power, and Hamner, with Woodie Held, a versatile seven-position guy, also on the bench.

Rich Harden may break into this team's starting rotation in about 15 years ... John Halama never will, but we all continue to contemplate our Inner Halama ... Carroll Hardy is the only man ever to pinch-hit for both Ted Williams and Carl Yastrzemski; in fact, he's the only man to pinch-hit for Williams, period ... There are some great "H" names like Drungo Hazewood and Ducky Hemp, to name just two ... Clint Hartung never became the combination of Ty Cobb and Cy Young he was supposed to be ... If we needed additional lefty starting pitching, it'd be no shame to go to Teddy Higuera, Billy Hoeft or Joe Hoerner ... 2B Ken Hubbs was the '62 NL Rookie of the Year before dying tragically in a plane crash the next year at age 23 ... The Sons of Sam Horn are probably wondering when their boy will earn mention, and now he has ...

Among the other players who earned at least a passing glance were two Hall of Fame OF in Harry Hooper and Chick Hafey, along with Torii Hunter, Willie Horton, William "Dummy" Hoy, Tommy Harper, Jeff Heath, George Hendrick, Jim Hickman, Tommy Henrich, Richard Hidalgo, Bobby Higginson and Larry Hisle and IF Ron Hansen, Tommy Helms, Richie Hebner, Tommy Herr, Rex "Wonder Dog" Hudler, all-time single-season HBP leader Ron Hunt and yes, the O-Dog, Orlando Hudson ... But none of them quite make the cut for ...

THE PREPARATION "H"
** indicates Hall of Famer
* indicates All-Star

MGR: Bucky Harris**
Coaches: Miller Huggins**, Ned Hanlon**. Walt Hriniak, Ralph Houk

Lineup
C Gabby Hartnett**
1B Gil Hodges*
2B Rogers Hornsby**
SS Granny Hamner*
3B Bob Horner*
LF Rickey Henderson*
CF Billy Hamilton**
RF Harry Heilmann**
DH Frank Howard*

Bench
C Elston Howard*
COR IF Keith Hernandez*
IF Toby Harrah*
UTIL Woodie Held*
UTIL Paul Hines (.302 20 years all nine positions)

How's That Pitching? ... We have four Hall of Famers in the rotation in Catfish Hunter, Carl Hubbell, Waite Hoyt and Jesse Haines, with Ken Holtzman -- a two-time All-Star who won at least 17 in a season six time -- taking the second lefty spot. In the bullpen, you have a terrific righty/lefty combo of long men in Harvey Haddix, who pitched the greatest single game of all time, and Charlie Hough, the old knuckleballer. Like everyone else in the bullpen, both were All-Stars at one time or another.

For the late innings, you have a dominant closer in Trevor Hoffman set up by lefty Willie Hernandez, whose 1984 Cy Young-winning campaign was one of the great relief seasons of all time, and righty Roberto Hernandez, who joins Hoffman in the all-time top 10 in saves.

But we certainly have plenty of options for the bullpen if the combination we have in place right now doesn't work out; in addition to Henke, there's Bryan Harvey, with two 45+ save seasons to his credit; current All-Star Dustin Hermanson; John Hiller, who held the single-season saves record at 38 for 11 years; switch-pitcher Greg Harris; longtime LOOGY Rick Honeycutt; not to mention, in no particular order, Jay Howell, Al Hrabosky, Tom Hume, Shigetoshi Hasegawa, LaTroy Hawkins, Neal Heaton. Mike Henneman Bill Henry and (no relation) Doug Henry. Matt Herges, Felix Heredia, Darren Holmes and Bobby Howry.

That's one H of a bullpen, folks. But really, with all those Hall of Famers in the rotation, how much will they be needed, anyway? And there's plenty of starting staff depth, too; if Mike Hampton wins 11 games this season, he will become the 11th pitcher with at least 144 wins (the equivalent of 12 years averageing 12 wins each year) -- including two 200-game winners -- who is NOT on this team.

That's no "gross" exaggeration -- nearly a dozen pitchers with a dozen-dozen wins not even making the team, starting with Mel Harder at 223 and Orel Hershiser at 204.

Rotation
RHSP Jim "Catfish" Hunter**
LHSP Carl Hubbell**
RHSP Waite Hoyt**
LHSP Ken Holtzman*
RHSP Jesse Haines**

Bullpen
CL-R Trevor Hoffman*
LH-SET Willie Hernandez*
RH-SET Roberto Hernandez*
LONG-LH Harvey Haddix*
LONG-RH Charlie Hough*

Okay, Bauxites, how can you help this team?

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