A Special Episode of "Frasor"

Thursday, August 09 2007 @ 02:05 PM EDT

Contributed by: Mick Doherty

Jason Frasor turns 30 today.

Nobody born on Aug. 9 has (yet) been inducted into the Baseball Hall of Fame in Cooperstown, though one may "percivere" into the shrine one day and another has "neon"-ed his way to consideration for the NFL Hall in Canton.

Actually, no less than 55 men born on this day have played in the major leagues, including a half dozen or so (like Frasor) still active. So presumably we will be able to cobble together a pretty decent 8/9 ballclub in this "Frasor" edition (even though Jason isn't even going to make the team!) of the Hall of Names, which we can only call ...

Tossed Salad and Scrambled Eggs
** indicates Hall of Famer (none so far)
* indicates All-Star

MGR: Ralph Houk (1619-1531, three flags, two rings)
Bench Coach: Jack Tighe (99-104, 1957-58 DET)

C Jerry Moses* (.251, 1965, '68-75)
1B Phil Todt (.258, 57 homers, 1924-31)
2B Julian Javier* (.257, 1960-72)
SS Milt Bolling (.241, 1952-58)
3B Mike Lamb (.282, 68 homers midway through 2007)
LF Tommie Agee* (.255, 130 homers, 1962-73)
CF John Moses (.254, 1982-92)
RF Roman Mejias (.254, 1955, '57-64; led '62 HOU w/24 homers)
DH Ted Simmons* (.285, 248 homers, 1968-88)

C Steve Swisher* (.216, 1974-82)
IF Junior Kennedy (.248, 1974, '78-83)
SS Johnny Mitchell (.245, 1921-25)
OF Chuck Essegian (.255, 1958-63)
OF Deion Sanders (.263, 186 SB, parts of 1989-2001)
UTIL John Grim (C/IF/OF, .267, 1888-99)

LHSP Claude Osteen* (196-195, 1957-75)
RHSP Matt Morris* (111-77 through 2006)
LHSP Scott Karl (54-56, 1995-2000)
LHSP Matt Young* (55-95, 1983-93)
RHSP Fred Sanford (37-55, 1943-51)

CL-RH Troy Percival* (324 saves through 2005)
LHRP Brian Fuentes* (65 saves through 2006)
RHRP Bill Campbell* (83-68, 126 saves, 1973-87)
LHRP Paul Lindblad (68-63, 64 saves, 1965-78)
RHRP Jeff Zimmerman* (17-12, 32 saves, 1999-2001)

NOTES ... The club is overloaded behind the plate, relatively speaking, with three All-Star options -- so we'll DH Simmons and start Moses, with Swisher in reserve ... Grim was also primarily a backstop, though he displayed fairly typical 19th century diversity, appearing in at least 10 games at every position on the field except pitcher -- he took the mound just once, but hurled 3.1 shutout innings! ...

That's some bullpen, stuffed with four All-Stars and another solid long-career guy in Lindblad; not only did Frasor not make the cut on the team inspired by and named for him, but there are also other names you'll no doubt recognize -- Kevin Saucier, Bob Scanlan, Stan Clarke, Pat Mahomes, Dale Polley and Ron Flores, for instance, any of whom could be key anchor pieces to many other All-birthday bullpens ...

Yes, our starting lineup features two men named J. Moses, John and Jerry -- they were born exactly 11 years apart (1957 and 1946, respectively) and do not appear to be related ... There are a ton of "fun" names related to this day, such as Dike Varney, Highball Wilson, Bill Dammann and Kid Butler -- then there's Justin Stein, who should trade first names with fellow 8/9er Gary Timberlake to provide us with someone to sing the anthems (no, not "Gary Stein") ...

And yes, Fred Sanford is our fifth starter -- no, he did not apparently have an "& Son" make the big leagues, but is someone for us to keep in mind for future All-Sitcom character teams ...

So how would this team do in the 2007 AL East? Okay, how about the NL Central?