Just Kilo Me: Taking Another "Byte"

Saturday, July 19 2008 @ 11:06 PM EDT

Contributed by: Mick Doherty

Recently, we've run a couple of computer-pun-centric Hall of Names all-initials teams featuring major leagu monikers with the initials MB and GB. The next obvious stop, of course, is "KB," which seems might be, to gratuitously reference computer parlance, a "bit" lesser of a squad. Let's find out as we meet ...

KiBbles and Bytes
** indicates Hall of Famer
* indicates All-Star

Player/MGR: Ken Boyer (166-190, parts of 1978-80 STL)

LINEUP
C Kevin L. Brown (.254, 1996-2002; two-year stint in TOR)
1B Kevin Barker (.245, parts of 1999-2006; brief run with TOR)
2B Ken Boswell (.248, 1967-77)
SS Kim Batiste (.231, 1991-94, '96)
3B Ken Boyer* (1857-69, .287, 282 homers, 5 Gold Gloves, '64 NL MVP)
LF Kimera Bartee (.216, 1996-2001)
CF Ken Berry* (.255, two Gold Gloves, 1962-75)
RF Kevin Bass* (.270, 118 homers, 151 SB, 1982-95)
DH Kevin Buckley ()PS+ of 141 in 5 games, all as PH/PD with 1984 TEX)

BENCH
C VACANT
SS Kevin Baez (.179 for NYM, 1990, '92-93)
3B Kevin Bell (.222, 1976-80, '82)
UTIL Kurt Bevacqua (playedt P, C and CF; .236, 1971-85)
OF Kevin Batiste (two singles, 5 strikeouts in 8 AB with 1989 TOR)
OF Kevin Belcher (2-for-15 with 1990 TEX)

ROTATION
RHSP J. Kevin Brown* (211-144, 1986-2005)
LHSP Ken Brett* (83-85, 1967, '69-81; also .262 hitter with 10 homers)
RHSP Kent Bottenfield* (46-49, 1992-2001; 18-7 as '99 All-Star)
RHSP Kris Benson (68-73, 1999-2006)
LHSP Kevin Bearse (0-2, 12.91 with 1990 CLE)

BULLPEN
RHRP Karl Best (5-6, 1 save, 1983-86, '88)
RHRP Kirk Bullinger (2-0, 1 save in 49 games, 1998-2000, '03-04)
RHRP Ken Burkhart (27-20, 7 saves, 1945-59; 18-8, 2 saves with '45 STL)
LHRP Kurt Birkins (6-4 since '06; current ERA+ of 458, 10 IP with TBR)
RHRP Keith Brown (2-2, 3.40 with CIN, parts of 1988-92)
LHRP Kevin D. Brown (3-5, 1990-92 as S/RP)

Don't Kilo-ver! ... Boyer is the only KB to manage thus far in the history of the major leagues, but even if he wasn't skippering the club, he'd be a cinch to make the roster as (probably) its best player ... The team's top pitcher, on the other hand, is probably Kevin Brown; if his 211 wins, six All-Star appearance and five Top-6 Cy Young finishes (he never won the award) get him into the Hall of Fame -- they won't, but it's at least conceiveable -- he'd be the first KB so enshrined ... Besides, his name was actually James Kevin Brown, but he makes this team under the controversial "went by" rule ...

So all three Kevin Browns who played major league ball make this roster, but the important one isn't the rotation ace, it's Kevin-the-catcher Brown, who better be sturdy and stay healthy as there is no identifiable backup for him anywhere in big league history ... The only good thing about the lack of a backup catcher is that we can flip the short bench so as to extend to a six-man bullpen ... That bullpen doesn't really have a closer of any note, or even a dominant setup man to fill that role, so we'll go by committee, one "chaired" by former Mariner Karl Best -- you always want to trust your Best reliever, right? ... The final cuts from that bullpen were a couple of righties in Kevin Barry (1-1, 6.83 with 2006-07 ATL) and former Blue Jay Kevin Beirne (3-3, 2000-02, including five games with '01 TOR), which should tell you something ...

Ken Brett actually spent the final two seasons of his career in Kansas City, a teammate of kid brother George; the first of those two seasons was the year George hit .390 ... Ken "held" George to a .300 average himself, surrenduring six hits in 20 at-bats to his younger sibling ...

Sorry, William "Kitty" Bransfield, we'd love to have your .270 lifetime average (1898, 1901-11) available to play 1B for this team, but nicknames don't fit the "went by" bill ... Berry amd Bass start in the OF, and though both had successful longish careers, each was a one-time All-Star, in 1967 and 1986, respectively ... Bass, who was a 20/20 guy in 1986, was one of the PTBNLs Milwaukee sent to Houston for Don Sutton in 1982 ...

Think the Orioles regret including John Maine in the deal to get Kris Benson? ... In another uneven deal, the Mets packaged Kevin Baez for David Segui in 1994; Baez never appeared in the majors after the deal, though he bounced around pro ball for another half-decade or so ... In a lesser deal, but still one you think the Rockies would like to have back, the '01 Rox acquired Kimera Bartee (he went 0-for-15 with them) for a prospect named Chone Figgins ... Weirdly, Kurt Bevacqua, who played 15 years in the big leagues and hit .412 in the '84 World Series for the (losing) Padres, may be best remembered as the winner of the first-ever MLB bubblegum bubble-blowing contest; his "victory" was even commemorated on a 1976 TOPPS baseball card ... Batiste actually played slightly more at 3B (125 games) thn short (96 games), but manager Boyer won't be moving, um, himself from the hot corner ...

2 comments



https://www.battersbox.ca/article.php?story=20080719230631778