Vacationing in Orlando ...

Sunday, August 15 2010 @ 11:16 PM EDT

Contributed by: Mick Doherty

The official city motto of the great metropolis of Orlando, Florida, is "The City Beautiful." Anyone who's ever seen Orlando Hudson play second base might quickly convert that to "The Glove Beautiful," while older fans might counter with Orlando Cepeda as "The Big Bat Beautiful." Yankee fans of the past 10 or 12 years might insist on "El Duque Bonito." Hey, this might be a pretty good team! Although ...

... fewer than 30 men with the name Orlando have played major league ball, and that includes more than a dozen who had it as a middle name. Still, given that source, we might come up with a decent roster ... okay, not really, we only have three pitchers even eligible, and though two of them -- the aforementioned Duque Hernandez and Orlando Pena, were long-time warriors, it's hard to imagine they wouldn't get ... tired ... pitching every day. So what else can we do to expand the roster, Bauxites? And take a look at this really fine roster -- save the problem of pitching (and who hasn't heard that line before?), this team would contend in virtully every 2010 division. That said, let's meet baseball's ...

ORLANDO MAGIC
** Hall of Famer
* All-Star

Nobody named "Orlando" has yet managed in the major leagues.

LINEUP
C Orlando McFarlane (.240, parts of 1962-68)
1B Orlando Cepeda** (.297/379/1365; '58 NL ROY, '67 NL MVP)
2B Orlando Hudson* (.282, 87 homers, 4 Gold Gloves wince 2002)
SS Orlando Cabrera (.274, 117 homers, 208 steals since 1997)
3B Tomas Orlando Perez (.240, 1995-2008; mostly 2B/SS played 170+ games at 3B)
LF Orlando Palmeiro (.274, 1995-2007; mostly LF/RF, played 100+ games in CF)
CF Ryan Orlando Thompson (.243, 52 homers, 1992-2002)
RF Orlando Merced (.277, 103 homers, seven teams, 1990-2003)
DH Ralph Orlando "Socks" Seybold (.294, 51 homers, 1899 CIN, 1901-08 PHA)

BENCH
IF/OF/UTIL Eric Orlando Young Sr.* (.283, 79 homers, 465 SB, 1992-2006)
C Orlando Mercado (.199, seven teams, parts of 1982-90)
IF Abraham Orlando Nunez (.242, 1997-2008)
IF/UTIL Orlando "Marty" Martinez (.243, 1962, '67-72, six teams)
OF Orlando Isales (2-for-5, triple, three RBI in three games with '80 champ PHI)
OF Patrick Orlando Lennon (.265, four teams, parts of 1991-99)

PITCHING "STAFF"
RHSP Orlando Hernandez (90-65, 1998-2007; '99 AL ALCS MVP)
RHRP Orlando Pena (56-77, 40 sv., 1958-75, eight teams)
RHRP Frederick Orlando Trautman (one game, 3 IP, 2 ER, 1915 Newark Pepper of Fed league)

ALSO ELIGIBLE
C Orlando Sanchez (.218, 1981-84)
IF Orlando Miller (.259, 1994-97)
OF Orlando Alvarez (8-for-51, 1973-75 LAD, '76 CAL)
IF Luis Orlando Rodriguez (.243, 2005-09)
SS Rafael Orlando Robles (.188, parts of 1969-72 with SDP)
SS Orlando Ramirez (.189, parts of 1974-79 with CAL)
1B Kelvin Orlando Moore (.223/8/25, parts of 1981-83 with OAK)
2B/OF Eric Orlando Young Jr. (.245 so far, parts of 2009-10)
3B/1B Pedro Orlando Castellano  (.161, parts of 1993-96)
1B/OF Orlando Gonzalez (.238, three teams, parts of 1976-80)

Ready Or(lando) Not ... Seybold, who was an outfielder, led the 1902 AL in homers with an astounding (at the time) 16 -- almost a third of his career total of 51. Only four others even cracked double digits that year, and no one hit more than 11 ... Seybold didn't debut until the age of 28 and wasn't playing regularly until the age of 30 -- but still cobbled together a .294 career average and 1085 base hits before retiring at 37 ... Marty Martinez played all nine positions in his career, including one pitching appearance, but more importantly for the versatility of this roster, also caught in 30 games ...

Alvarez was surprisingly productive in his moderately disappointing stints with the Dodgers and Angels in the mid-1970s; his eight career base hits included two doubles, two home runs and knocked in eight batters, to boot .. Still, he never left LA ... Castellano was an original draft pick of the Rockies .... The briefness of Isales' career left him with a lifetime OPS+ of 251! ... Lennon was a high first-round pick of the sad-sack Mariners in 1986 and ended his career less than ceremoniously with the 1998-99 Jays ... Miller was part of the package Houston sent to Detroit in the 1996-97 off-season to acquire, among others, Brad Ausmus and Jose Lima ...

Nunez spent 12 years in the majors, all with teams from the old (pre-three-division) NL East -- everyone but the Cubs and Expos .. Nunez was actually originally a Blue Jay, but sent to Pittsburgh as part of the 1996 deal that acquired Carlos Garcia, Orlando Merced and Dan Plesac ... Thompson, originally drafted by the Jays in 1987, was part of the Jeff Kent package that acquired David Cone in 1992; he was acquired two other times by the Jays, in 1997 and after 2001, but never played an inning for the team ...

So, Bauxites ... How can we Orlan-do this team any better?

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