Very short on time today -- holidays, and all -- so you'll have to be contact with the following minor-league report, written entirely in senyru/haiku. Happy Canada Weekend.

I'm not the kind of person who likes to gloat when... what the hell am I saying? I am exactly the kind of person who likes to gloat when Our Boys beat the reigning world champions senseless, and leave them dazed and bleeding in a ditch by the side of the highway...

Saw a few things tonight I don't see nearly often enough. Ted the Tease pitched with heart and courage and smarts. He really did. Russ Adams had a couple of big RBI hits to the opposite field. Eric Hinske hit an RBI double, off a breaking ball.

Jamie Campbell and Tom Candiotti, otherwise in good form, were inexplicably attributing Reed Johnson's recent struggles to a lack of playing time - too much playing time lately seems a much more likely explanation - but everybody loves a pinch-hit grand slam.

Yes, lots and lots of stuff to like tonight.

The Jays face a mighty challenge this weekend -- but it's also an opportunity.

With no chance to gain head-to-head ground on the Bosox after this series until September 12, this series is as big as it gets if the Jays believe themselves worthy of contention. Any series that features a Doc start is a series the Jays have a chance to win -- can Ted Lilly keep up his recent success against the Beantowners?

This week's Scout features a bevy of bats, an old but dear friend, and an embattled closer looking for answers.

On to the Advance Scout!

I lift my glass to the Awful Truth
Which you can't reveal to the ears of youth
Except to say it isn't worth a damn

Say it loud. Say it proud. Leance has pop in his bat. Two homers (and two strikeouts) led Pulaski to victory, as the farm affiliates went 4-2.

138 years ago today -- well, right now, I think -- the British North America Act recognized the Dominion of Canada. And what better way to honour those drunken louts in Sir John A's first cabinet than a Hall of Names article?

But wait, there's a twist here...

Time for another fun foray into trivia land ... on this Canada Day, one new rule applies -- your question must somehow involve Canada (Expos, Blue Jays, Royals, Olympics, native sons, whatever).

All the other usual rules apply -- no looking up the answer using an internet resource, books are fine, you're the first one to get the answer right, you ask the next question.

And here's the first question (it's a doozy) ...

Welcome to yet another month-end report card for the Blue Jays, in which I presume to grade players from A+ to F. All grades are strictly non-scientific.

There are two things we need to remember about the Devil Rays:

1. They've only been around since 1998.

2. They suck, and they always have.

Now its a mighty long way down the dusty trail
And the sun burns hot on the cold steel rails
And I look like a bum and I crawl like a snail

This is the third and last batch of photographs from my trip to Washington, D.C. ...

Stomping the Devil Rays 12-3 is a little like enjoying a super-nice sunny afternoon in early July. It feels great, it's just what you want -- but it's also not an iota less than what you had fully expected. This is why no team really feels great after beating Tampa -- this franchise is so bad that its opponents' expectations of victory are exceedingly high. We'll return to the topic of high expectations later on in this report.

The pun was so nice, he used it twice.

Dustin returned to Double-A last night, the D-Jays At The Bat didn't help out Casey one bit, the Devil Rays' affiliates paid back Syracuse and Lansing for the 12-3 thrashing of the parent club and there was a little dispute involving the French. All told, a 2-4 night on the farm.

I bought a new hat.