Wow, there are lots of relievers ... I'll start the bidding with Dave Beard, Chin-Hui Tsao, Shingo Takatsu and Randy Nosek.

I hope there are some position players out there other than Foote and Legg!

There are a lot of Dick's to pick from, you probably could make an all-dick team.

How about Brow? I know there are Browers, not sure if any are good.

If nicknames were allowed Lenny "Nails" Dykstra, as well as the various three fingers guys, etc. could be in

Tony Armas perhaps? Tom Cheek with the play-by-play.

Sorry, missed that you had mentioned Cheek above. How bout Vin Scully?

How about Jerry Hairston Jr. for 2B? And maybe even Hairston Sr. if you need an extra OF.

If you need a LOOGY, you could do worse than Paul Assenmacher.

Joel Skinner might make an adequate C. I believe he was manager of Cleveland at one point too.

Well, here goes nothing
Manager(s) Mordecai BROWn, Gabby HARTnett

Starters
C Barry Foote
1B Frank BROWer
2B Tommy Herr*
3B Chris BROWn*
SS Jimmy BROWn*
OF Tony ARMas Sr.*
OF Saturnino Orestes ARMas Minoso Arrieta AKA MInnie MiNOSo*
OF Gates BROWn
DH Gabby HARTnett**

Bench
C Grover HARTley
COR
MID Larry BROWn
OF Ollie BROWn
OF Topsy HARTsel
UTIL Ike BROWn

Starting Rotation
RH Mordecai 'Three-FINGER' BROWn**
RH Kevin BROWn*
RH Bartolo COLON*
RH Rickey BONES*
LH Tom BROWning*

Bullpen
RH Rollie Fingers**
RH ARMando Benitez
RH Roy FACE*
RH HIPolito Pichardo
LH Paul ASSenmacher

The hardest spot to fill was 1B and I couldn't find anybody who could be considered a Corner Infielder. After finishing this, I noticed a wealth of Right-handed pitchers. I am sure there are more capable Left-handed pitchers but I give up. I know that this roster can be improved upon because I didn't necessarily look for the best player at each position but for the first body part I could find.

smcs, that's great ... I wonder if we can do it with only using each name once, though?

Also, rather than all the BROWns out there, I think you gotta go with former Blue Jay RHRP Scott BROW -- an exact match.

Also, we can add a former 20-game winner in RHSP Bill HANDS and of course, another RHSP in HOFer Jim PALMer. Hm., what about Rick Ankiel (ankle)? Fran Healy (heel)? Rather than Shingo Takatsu and another RP, we could go with OF Tsuyoshi SHINjo. All-Star C Jake EARly? Hey, if RHRP Buck MARROW works the same game as Ricky BONES, we'll have a bones-marrow tansfusion!

Ooh, I thought of the NFL's Reggie Tongue and did a search, and though we won't accept his nickname of "Wagon Tongue," we can surely find a spot for SS/2B/0F Bill Keister??

I didn't think to use Palm and so now I have a quality 1B in Rafael PALMeiro.

How about Neal Ball.... I mean a guy could have only one so plural shouldn't be necessary. :) He played for the Yankees, Indians and Red sox from 1907 -1913 and racked up 404 hits mostly playing shortstop.

Here are a few more:

2B Jimmy Bloodworth
RHRP Hal Toenes
34 guys named Chester
RHRP Fred Lasher
C Harry Cheek
OF Chin-Feng Chen
LHRP Bots Nekola (that's a reach!)
RHSP Jack Armstrong
RHRP Tom Butters
RHSP Danny Haren

Here's what we have so far, with the given caveats of using a body part once and a name once, each:

Body By Box
**indicates Hall of Famer
* indicates All-Star

LINEUP
C Jake Early*
1B Rafael Palmeiro*
2B Jerry Hairston Jr.
SS Neil Ball*
3B Jim Ray H(e)art*
LF Tony Armas Sr.*
CF Chester "Chet" Lemon*
RF Tsuyoshi Shinjo
DH

BENCH
C Barry Foote
2B/SS/3B Greg Legg
SS/2B/0F Bill Keister
OF
OF Chin-Feng Chen
UTIL

ROTATION
RHSP Bartolo Colon*
RHSP
RHSP Bill Hands
RHSP Rickey Bones*
LHSP

BULLPEN
CL-R Rollie Fingers**
LHRP Paul Assenmacher
RHRP Roy Face*
LHRP Bots Ne(c)kola
LHRP Herb Hippauf

We make up for the right-heavy rotation by going lefty-heavy in the 'pen, even though we lose a power Arm (literally) in Arm-ando Benitez so we can slide Tony Armas Sr. into the outfield ... that also makes room for Bots Nekola, who needs to earn an extra "C" to become eligible for the team. Likewise, Jim Ray Hart gets an "E," presumably for effort and not for error, in order to stick at the hot corner.

We're missing another two SP -- we'd love to have one be a lefty -- as well as a starting DH and a backup utilityman (no positional requirements necessary) and one additional backup OF. Remember, no repeats, either of names or of body parts, but if you can swing a deal to replace someone, as I did with the "Arm"s race above, pitch the idea and let's fill out this roster!

The Starting Pitchers could be Mordecai BROWn, Walter JOHnson. The last one you have to think about it a bit.

Brandon Backe will help fill out the rotation. Johnny Lipon was a pretty good shortstop for the Tigers, and Butts Wagner should get there simply because of his name.

Oh, yeah. And Dave Brain is a capable backup middle IF if you need one.

If you still need starters, while he was used mostly as a reliever, righty Dennis Ribant does have 56 starts to his credit.

Oliver Perez is a promising lefty, but Al Oliver sure would make a nice DH.

You know, I was watching "Ripley's Believe It or Not" and saw a guy who was born with a horn on his head...so does this free up Rogers Hornsby?

Anyone ever watch SNL (dumb question)? David Cone(head) anyone?

All dumb suggestions aside, how about Dave SteWART, Jim BOTTOMley, Steve BlASS (was he better than ASSenmacher?), Don GULLET,

At 1B (backup) we could have Fenton MOLE We might also see LHP Joe PATE or OF Bob PATE or SS Freddie PATEk, who also played 2B, 3B, and the OF. We must not forget RHP Epp SELL, and how did we forget C/1B/3B/RF/2B/LF GENE Tenace?

Great stuff -- here's a complete roster, but don't let that stop anyone from offering improvements, either better players OR new/more clever body parts. Are we breaking the letter of the "no repeats" law by allowing both Jim Bottomley and Paul Assenmacher on the team?

That's actually a heckuva pitching staff!

Body By Box
**indicates Hall of Famer
* indicates All-Star

LINEUP
C Jake Early*
1B Jim Bottomley**
2B Jerry Hairston Jr.
SS Neil Ball*
3B Jim Ray H(e)art*
LF Tony Armas Sr.*
CF Chester "Chet" Lemon*
RF Tsuyoshi Shinjo
DH Rafael Palmeiro*

BENCH
C Barry Foote
2B/SS/3B Greg Legg
SS/3B/2B Johnny Lipon
IF/OF Dave Brain
OF Chin-Feng Chen
UTIL Gene Tenace

ROTATION
RHSP Bartolo Colon*
LHSP Don Gullett
RHSP Bill Hands
LHSP Oliver Perez
RHSP Rickey Bones*

BULLPEN
CL-R Rollie Fingers**
LHRP Paul Assenmacher
RHRP Roy Face*
LHRP Bots Ne(c)kola
LHRP Herb Hippauf

Ed HEAD would make a decent addition to the rotation (RH).

Shinjo's a nice player, but he needs to be shifted to the bench to make room for Hall of Famer and all-time triples leader Sam Crawford.

You're not including Mordecai BROWn** in the starting rotation? I also think that Gabby HARTnett** would be an improvement at catcher. The manager could be EARl Weaver or EARle Combs in the outfield or perhaps EARly Wynn in the starting rotation.
Or perhaps GENE Alley as a backup infielder over Greg Legg

Yeah, that's the problem with arbitrarily setting rules. I felt like I couldn't include any of the "Brown" candidates when Scott Brow was around, but he clearly wasn't good enough to make the roster.

If we include Early Wynn, and it's hard to ignore 300 wins, that means we cut Jake Early and I assume Gene Tenace would then be the catcher. That leaves us down a utility guy on the bench.

Bob SKINner deserves some consideration for at least a bench position--he's a two-time All Star.

Johnny TEMPLE would make a good utility player as well, and he's a four-time All Star

It's a bit of a stretch, but CALVin Ripken (calf)?

Temple, oh, yeah! In fact, I think he starts at short, since "Ball" is at best slang. I guess that means we should, uh, kick Keister off the team, too?