Batter's Box Interactive Magazine Batter's Box Interactive Magazine Batter's Box Interactive Magazine
This will possibly be the most pointless game report ever written, as the game was rained out. On top of that, as Dante Hicks would say "I'm not supposed to be here today!" So instead, I'll report on the spring training scores from the Classic Video Game league yesterday.

Game 1: Warlords 5 - Gorf 3.

Gorf started out with an early lead, as Gorfian Droid #3 hit a solo shot against off of the Blue Warlord. The 1-0 score would hold until the sixth inning, when the Orange Warlord hit the ball back up the middle, striking the Gorfian Flagship. A flying Gorf was summoned in from the pen, but even his unusual "subquark torpedo" windup could not stop the bleeding. The Yellow Warlord came in and notched his 5th save.

Game 2: Realsports Baseball 7 - Pete Rose Baseball 3.

Classic Video Game Commissioner Bentley Bear is looking into allegations that Mr. Rose may have bet against his own team. The only evidence so far is a number of inexplicable managerial moves, such as replacing Nick Esasky with one of the cats from Mouse Trap in the third inning.

Game 3: Mr. Do! 7 - Dig Dug 1.

In a surprising upset, the small-market Mr. Do! squadron topped the big budget Dig Duggers. The Do Run Runners exploited the weak defense of their opponents, getting several power balls past the all-Pooka infield. Dig Dug starting pitcher Fygar tried his best to beat off the strong attacks of the Alpha Monsters, but he made it obvious to all that he felt his team was letting him down:

Game 4: Sinistar 12 - Pooyan 0

I mean, c'mon. It's Sini-friggin-Star! Like he's going to lose to a team of baby pigs and a pack of sissy little wolves. Run Coward! indeed.

Game 5: Intellivision Major League Baseball 9 - Colecovision Super Action Baseball 0 (forfeit)

The Colecovision squad refused to take the field until they could get better uniforms. I don't think anyone can blame them:

A pink hat, a pink uniform top, and red pants! What colour are those socks? Fuscia? You know your uniform sucks when the 1977 San Diego Padres feel sorry for you.

Did I miss any games? It was a long day at work yesterday...

Spring Training Game Report 7 Blue Jays 0, Pirates 0 | 20 comments | Create New Account
The following comments are owned by whomever posted them. This site is not responsible for what they say.
Mick Doherty - Thursday, March 10 2005 @ 11:31 AM EST (#105403) #
There was one other I know of, but it was intrasquad, so I can see how you missed it. Strat-O-Matic (Dice) relied on some old fashioned small-ball to knock off Strat-O-Matic (online/subscription fee required) 4-0, as the new kids got nothing out of their DH, rug burn from bad astroturf and hd trouble with the sun as they couldn't get the dome to close. The old guard relied on a nine-inning shutout performance and an amazing run of rolled doubles to get the win.
Craig B - Thursday, March 10 2005 @ 11:43 AM EST (#105406) #
What colour are those socks? Fuscia?

I'm not sure they're wearing socks.

Also, in Lunch Menu League action, Turkey Club on Whole Wheat Toast swept a doubleheader from Chicken Salad, by scores of 6-1 and 11-4.

Named For Hank - Thursday, March 10 2005 @ 11:59 AM EST (#105410) #
In today's lunch menu action, the local sushi restaurant seems poised to knock off the leftovers in the fridge. I'll keep you posted as to the results.
Craig B - Thursday, March 10 2005 @ 12:08 PM EST (#105411) #
I hope it doesn't end in a Tai.
Mick Doherty - Thursday, March 10 2005 @ 12:51 PM EST (#105417) #
I like the leftovers' chances. They're always good for a grand salami.
Skills - Thursday, March 10 2005 @ 12:54 PM EST (#105418) #
Elsewhere in the lunch menu league, Waking up My Girlfriend to Make Me Lunch trounced Making it Myself by a score of 11-0.
Mike D - Thursday, March 10 2005 @ 01:06 PM EST (#105420) #
Making It Myself has some real issues. Far too many PBs behind the plate.

Offensively, the team struggles to even make contact except for the occasional can o' corn.
Named For Hank - Thursday, March 10 2005 @ 01:36 PM EST (#105421) #
In the end it was close -- the leftovers were stuffed eggplant -- but sushi beat 'em in extra innings.

Leftovers have the inside track in tonight's dinner league game, however.

And Mick, that was magnificently horrible.

We should do Lunch League updates every day!
Mike Green - Thursday, March 10 2005 @ 02:38 PM EST (#105426) #
Leftovers are the team of choice for Beane-o-philes. Always within budget, and makes good use of talent developed from within.
Dave Till - Thursday, March 10 2005 @ 03:02 PM EST (#105429) #

Gorf started out with an early lead, as Gorfian Droid #3 hit a solo shot against off of the Blue Warlord. The 1-0 score would hold until the sixth inning

This is the sort of thing you might expect would happen when a team has been seduced by the Dollarball philosophy.

In baseball, as I learned to love it when I was growing up, players do the little things right: they bunt runners over, make productive outs, give themselves up for the team, and put their pants on one leg at a time. Dollarball, as I understand it, is built entirely around the triple and the sacrifice fly. Half the lineup consists of whippetlike ferrets (or ferretlike whippets) who slap the ball on the ground and run like heck - assuming, usually correctly, that the opposition's steroid-fuelled outfielders are too musclebound to chase down the ball and relay it into third base on time. The other half of the lineup consists of hulking Visigoths who have been instructed to hit the ball in the air at whatever cost, thus plating the quivering, amphetamine-enhanced Thoroughbreds on third.

Sure, the Dollarball approach may seem effective at first glance. A Dollar-based offense can often be counted on to score two runs an inning (with a runner stranded on third by a Visigoth who has forgotten that you can't score a run with a sacrifice fly when there are two out), and that's sometimes almost enough to counteract the effect of the Gorf bullpen, which consists entirely of flakes and arsonists. But where is the joy? Where are those things we learned to love about baseball when we were growing up, such as the endless throws over to first base, the tacky polyester uniforms, and pitcher batting averages below .100? Sometimes, I fear for the future of the game, and indeed of the whole human race.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to go get some Ovaltine and oatmeal, and then have a long nap. All this fulminating has worn me out. And get off my lawn, you kids. Sheesh.

Brian W - Thursday, March 10 2005 @ 03:26 PM EST (#105435) #
I guess this is the best spot to point this out: TSN has announced its Jays broadcast schedule for the year (42 games) featuring Black & Tabler.
Brian W - Thursday, March 10 2005 @ 03:28 PM EST (#105436) #
And Sportsnet has announced its 103 games featuring Jamie Campbell and a rotating cast of Candiotti, Fletcher, Mulliniks and Tabler.
Elijah - Thursday, March 10 2005 @ 04:17 PM EST (#105444) #
John Valentin has quit from the Fisher Cats. Last week, Ricciardi was on MLB on XM Radio gushing over Valentin. Oh well.
Sherrystar - Thursday, March 10 2005 @ 04:41 PM EST (#105447) #
So thats 103 Sportsnet plus 42 TSN equals 145 games on the telie. I wonder what 17 games are missing and whether we'll be able to catch them somewhere else?
cwally - Thursday, March 10 2005 @ 05:02 PM EST (#105449) #
an interesting tidbit from baseball prospectus on 2b defense. according to pecota,
Top 5 2005 AL Defensive Second Basemen, by PECOTA Projected Fielding Runs
Player Team Games FRAA
Orlando Hudson TOR 113 8
Omar Infante DET 121 1
Adam Kennedy ANA 111 1
Luis Rivas MIN 93 1
Rey Sanchez TBA 50 1
Not that I put a lot of faith in their defensive projections, it's still weird that besides hudson, no one is really that productive defensively (or offensively really) at 2nd base in al.
Ron - Thursday, March 10 2005 @ 05:36 PM EST (#105452) #
I wonder if there's any chance the 17 games would go to PPV.

I forget how many Jay games were shown last season.
Named For Hank - Thursday, March 10 2005 @ 05:40 PM EST (#105453) #
Last year, some games ended up on The Score and Toronto 1, as well. I think there were only a few that were not televised at all.
James W - Thursday, March 10 2005 @ 05:44 PM EST (#105454) #
I've been told from someone listening to the Fan that Mike Wilner reported that Batista will be the closer, and both Towers and Chacin will be in the rotation.
Blue in SK - Thursday, March 10 2005 @ 05:58 PM EST (#105455) #
Quick reminder to everyone that the Jays game against the Yankees is televised tonight on RSN.

Mussina/Pavano vs. Chacin/Towers is the matchup.
StephenT - Thursday, March 10 2005 @ 10:56 PM EST (#105624) #
Found the full Jays TV schedule here:

e.g. 3rd game of the season is not televised, then none of the 3 in Oakland (including their home opener), though I'm hoping MLB Extra Innings has some of those games.
Spring Training Game Report 7 Blue Jays 0, Pirates 0 | 20 comments | Create New Account
The following comments are owned by whomever posted them. This site is not responsible for what they say.