I ain't what I used to be, but who the hell is?
-- Dizzy Dean

Gotta run, my government's collapsing. This morning's minor-league update is another rapdily assembled all-poetry edition, but in the interests of diversity, we've expanded beyond the basic haiku into a bunch of other cliched formats, including one limerick, three spoken-words, and a little Ogden Nashery.

Dave Purcey's Double-A premiere was underwhelming, and Adam Lind exploded on a 3-3 night for the farm system.

It was Korean Night at the Rogers Centre, and Chan Ho Park was even scheduled to pitch. So what does Texas do? They trade him to San Diego an hour before the game starts.

Then they send John "Way-Back" Wasdin to the mound, and Wasdin and Doug Brocail completely shut down the Toronto offense. The hitters, one assumes, must have been really, really tired, although Buck Showalter had no sympathy whatsoever:

We got to our hotel room at 4 a.m. two days in a row. I don't want to hear about 18 innings when they are at home and get to sleep in their own bed.

Toronto welcomes the homer-happy Rangers for the first time this season. The Jays are simultaneously high and tired after their 18-inning victory and sweep over the West-leading Angels. Meanwhile, the Rangers took three of four in Baltimore, almost mitigating a disastrous four-game sweep at home by Oakland. The Rangers appreciate the Jays for their efforts, but they will try to douse Toronto’s giddiness over the weekend. The team that sweeps this series can reclaim vital ground in the race for the wildcard or division lead.

On to the Advance Scout!

What a performance last night against the Angels! Here's Pete Walker:

You gotta be careful with your body. Your body is like a bar of soap. The more you use it, the more it wears down.
-- Dick Allen

In other words, don't expect to see Gregg Zaun catching tonight...

It wasn't a carnival or a bridge game in Syracuse, as the Chiefs restored order against the Indians. The farm affiliates went 4-3.

My interesting life has led me to watch this game backwards: I heard the eighth and ninth innings on the radio, watched the game on TV from the tenth onwards, and now (now being Thursday night just past midnight) I'm watching a recording of the first nine innings that I missed. And I'm really tired, so here's an unranked, randomly ordered list of people who were all out of bubble gum so they had to do that other thing they came to do:

Could the Blue Jays complete a sweep of the visiting Anaheim Angels (I refuse to call them anything but that) this evening? Dave Bush thinks so, and since he's getting the ball tonight, well, that's a good thing. John Lackey, who's quietly putting up some eye-popping strikeout numbers this year, counters for Anaheim.

FINALLY! Jays win in 18 innnings 2-1.

There’s an intricate etiquette that applies to the ferry from Toronto Island Airport to the mainland, and this guy didn’t get it. Even though I was in the last row of the puddle-jumper that landed at the airport late yesterday afternoon, I had no luggage and I was an old hand at this. I strode past the other passengers – you mosey, you lose – and ended up fourth in the makeshift lineup that waits at the entrance for the ferry to return to the island.

It's unbelievable how much you don't know about the game you've been playing all your life.
-- Mickey Mantle

Continuing the photo of the day theme week, here's Vinnie Chulk. Check out the expression on his face -- it's like he's thinking "You're already out":

Two split doubleheaders, two rainouts and two single game losses featuring some poor pitching. Ricky Romero starts but Eric Fowler was better.

Picture of the Day Mojo works again! as Jason Frasor, struggling recently, pitches out of a big eighth inning jam. Miguel Batista wriggled off another hook in the tenth. Josh Towers pitched seven strong innings, Russ Adams dashed home with the winning run on a wild pitch, and it all sounds like a great night to have been in the ball park. I wish I'd been there.

So when you guys get home from 518, don't be shy!

For the most part, pitching looks like a normal, fluid, graceful motion while you're watching it. But when you freeze it, it looks very odd. For example, here's the tail end of a Jason Frasor pitch: