Ignorance is kind
There's no comfort in the truth
Pain is the hole you'll find.

Two weeks ago, I was downplaying a 12-0 sweep, in which several of the categories were decided by slim margins. Last week, I squeaked out a 7-4 decision that could have gone either way. Once again, I feel fortunate, as my Toronto Walrus remains in first place after a 10-2 victory over the Thunderbirds that doesn't reflect how close the match really was. A mere .008 of AVG, .011 of OBP and .09 in K/BB decided three "games" — I was relieved when it was over, as my hitters, who had been strong all week, collapsed with a 5/38 Sunday. But I'll take it.

Based on an admittedly small sample size, May does not appear to be the panacea that Blue Jays fans might have been hoping for. After a pretty excruciating road trip through Chicago and Minnesota, the Jays return home to face last year's surprise team, the Kansas City Royals, which this year has been looking unsurprisingly awful. Tony Pena's club is doing its best to prove that last year's successful campaign was, in fact, the fluke that it appeared; sound familiar? Lefty Jimmy Gobble faces The Illustrated Man, Justin Miller, in a 7:05 pm start.

I began putting together these monthly Farm Reports last April. The impetus, at least in part, came from the need for some distraction from the Blue Jays’ terrible start. Plus ca change. Anyway, that first report a year ago featured some excellent news about several players having breakout seasons, including such up-till-then disappointments as Guillermo Quiroz and Alexis Rios. There are plenty of good-news stories in this year’s inaugural farm report, too (all stats current to April 30). I hope you enjoy this instalment.

Something's gotta give. The last-place Kansas City Royals, just 1-10 on the road this season, visit SkyDome, where the homestanding Blue Jays are a mere 1-8.

As you might expect from a team with a worse record than our slumping Jays, the Royals are struggling mightily to come up with timely hits -- the brilliant all-around play of Carlos Beltran notwithstanding. On the pitching side, the news is even worse for K.C.; their 5.55 ERA is easily the AL's worst, and they've struck out a league-fewest 113 batters, which equals one hundred fewer victims than those claimed by the Cubs' staff thus far.

Three hittable lefties are on the docket for the Jays this week. One of these two teams will snap out of its funk. Who will it be?

On to the Advance Scout!

The Jays' top two farm clubs muscled their way to victories, while the lower clubs lost by an aggregate of 32-7!! Together, the four games were a microcosm of the parent club's season to date:

With the first month in the books, it's time to hand out some Minor League hardware:

The Jays lost game 1 4-3, but won the nightcap 10-6 as the F-Cat went 6-6 at the plate.

The Jays are 4 and 5 on the current road trip and win this afternoon would also mean a split in the four-game series against the White Sox. Miguel Batista takes the mound against tall righthander Jon Garland in a pay-per-view only (in Canada) Sunday afternoon game.

Batista has an impressive repertoire and has had good hop on his fastball all season. Unfortunately, his command has been sub-par, resulting in a lot of deep counts and more than the occasional walk - something that usually spells doom in the American League.

Garland has made 5 starts (and 2 relief appearances) against the Jays and is 4-0 with a 1.56 ERA from 2001 to the present. With Joe Kennedy now in the National League, Garland is the reigning Blue Jays killer.

Roy Halladay v Mark Buehrle - take two.

Ted Lilly v Dan Wright in the evening affair.

Hi. For those of you who are new here: at the end of every month, I like to write up a monthly report card for the Jays, grading each player on a scale from A+ ("we're not worthy") to F ("get out of town, and don't come back"). Here's the card for April.

Warning: my comments are remarkably free of statistical analysis, and occasionally are over-reliant on overworked metaphors. Read at your own risk.

Today's menu: a comeback victory in the bottom of the ninth, a fifteen-inning heartbreaker, and a pair of 6-1 thrashings (for the good guys) in the low minors.

...bring May Doubleheaders!

Last year was the year of the Marlins. This year, could it be the year of the Marlon? Ten members of the Batter's Box roster have cast their first monthly ballots in tracking progress for the eventual presentation of the 2004 Andujar Award. While 29 players received mention -- exactly half of the 58 who were "nominated" in various pre-season discussions on Da Box -- only one player was on all 10 ballots.

Ladies and gentlemen, meet your May 1 Andujar Leader ... Marlon Anderson. While the 10 first-place votes were split among six players, with nobody receiving more than two, Anderson nabbed 83 of a possible 100 points in this first in-season survey.

The details of where the '04 Andujars stand ...

For a change the Jays top tier teams were victorious, while "THE ALLEY CATS LOSE". Did we ever think we would see this day?